Archive for 2015
"The Goal of all Life is Death"
-Sigmund Freud
This past days I spent my free time watching anime and playing games.
It has always been like that. I don't really know if it's just become my hobby or my addiction.
I watch. . .
I play. . .
I watch. . .
I play. . .
It has always been like that. . .
I can barely remember the memories when I was still a child who enjoys playing computer games even if only for 30 minutes or an hour.
I guess I have reached my bliss point.
As I was doing the same routine, I stumbled upon an on-going anime.
"Overlord"
I tried to watch it, out of boredom.
It took my interest for the story is about a player who where trapped in another world where in he became his character from a Dive Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game or DMMORPG "Yggdrasil". In that world, he was the most powerful being for he was a high level spell caster and because he is not a human.
I continued to watch until the latest episode, episode 12.
The main character, Ains was casting a very powerful skill called "Skill:The Goal of all Life is Death". Then, after the casting of skill, Everything in the area of effect died.
I was astonished!
But after a while it made me think.
"The Goal of all Life is Death".
If the goal of all life is death, then are we just wasting our time living?
In life, We came across with lots of struggles. It's like a Role Playing Game (RPG).
We control our very own character. We are the ones who would decide what to do with this character. We choose what path to take and those paths would lead us to great treasured but as we go along with this adventures, we would come across with different monsters and quest, from the very basic quest and easiest monster up to the most difficult quest and hardest monsters. But unlike in RPGs we only have one life.
Then, are we just wasting our time living?
For me, I would say no. In RPGs, experience is the most important thing. With experience, new levels and skills will be learned. It's the same with life, experience leads us to new skills that we can learn. It also helps us to make decisions based on the memories of the past experiences that we encountered. The experience that we gained is priceless. It can never be sold to anyone. The hardships the we encounter, the pain and pleasure that took our time. Everything that we learned and acquired is like a diamond, it went through a lot of heat before becoming a very beautiful gem.
But its not just the experience but the emotions that we encountered as we ventured across this journey of life. The memories that painted our life with black, red, yellow and many more colors. The memories of our love ones. The memories of the games and animes that I have watched. The memories of the past that I have already forgotten but I know that it still lingers somewhere in my mind. The memories that can no longer be repeated. All those priceless things that made my life and all those things that would still come in my life.
With all those things in mind, I would say, We are not wasting our time living, instead it would be a waste if we did not continue on living. We still have a lot of things to encounter, a lot of monsters to defeat and a lot of quest to achieve. There are still a lot of things in life that you haven't encountered. So why surrender?
Now I ask you.
Would you waste your time waiting for the goal of all life without doing a meaningful and memorable thing?
Or
Would you rather "waste" your time Living?
They say that life is made up of infinite choices, that we are here because of destiny or fate, and that life is a game of chances. Many say that the possibilities are endless, but some say life is a gamble.
For me, life has very limited choices or, if you are
lucky, no choice at all. It is not about chances because it is all about
choices. Destiny doesn’t exist because we are where we are right now because we
chose to be here. We didn’t just ride the waves and hoped it will lead us to a
better place. We may not be able to choose which family to be into but we chose
the path. I know it’s ironic that I said that life leaves you without a second
choice and yet we chose to be here where we are now, but what I meant was we
chose to move forward. We didn’t stay and play safe. We gambled. We were
uncertain of what we will be facing yet we chose to move on.
Like gambling, life is also addicting. The more I
live, the more I want to live, expecting something great to happen. I remember
the time when I got addicted to the crane-like-machine that had stuffed toy
prizes. I guess it may be called gambling. Then if so, it may also be called as
life. Consider this: I insert a token, then move the crane, reach and grab the
prize, go back, get my prize, then celebrate. It’s very similar to life. I
sacrifice because I chose, I act, I try reach my goal, when I obtain my goal I
go back to my family and to square one, then I enjoy my accomplishment and
start again. If ever I don’t get the prize, I try again, and the wheel of life
continues to turn. Like our life, we try and try. I gambled to leave the
comfort of my own home to study here at the University of the Philippines
Baguio.
There was a time when all the toys I got from the
crane were displayed on our shelf. I was admiring them, appreciating my hard
work, and feeling satisfied with my efforts. We can compare this to our lives.
We tend to take a step back and to reminisce our good memories, specifically
our achievements in life. When we are losing track, we look at our accomplished
goals and think what of we have done to finish the task then use it to our task
at hand.
I enjoyed the crane game because I knew there will
be a prize if I tried. Many of us lose hope because we don’t want to gamble. We
want to keep it safe. We only feel happiness when the prize is at our hands. We
disregard the fun in doing the task. If only we could see life in simple
activities, like the crane game to me. Just doing the things makes us happy.
The prize matters but how you got it is what really is important.
I am not saying that we should gamble every single
time we get the chance. I am saying that we should not play safe all the time.
Playing safe is safe so it is good for us, but sometimes we need to think
out-of-the-box. Sometimes we need to activate our inner googliness. We just can’t just pray and then do nothing. But we
can’t just do something without thinking the situation out first, or doing
something when we know we are incapable of doing.
For me the crane is like my life. When i succeed, I give the prize to others. I dedicate it to others. I make the people around me happy. Making everyone smile is my goal. Keeping my eyes on the prize and my heart on the art of playing the game. That is my life. The life of a crane game addict.
In the end, it all boils down to doing it one step
at a time. You don’t move the crane without putting a coin in. like life we
can’t move if trade-off does not occur. We need to give something up before we
act. We act, we fail, we try again and again and again. We need to make the
right choices, and if we have no choice at all, we need to be creative. We need
to act and think bit by bit, one step at a time.
~Dizzy is Justice~
Bumuhos ang matinding ulan sa kalangitan,
Wari bagang nakikisama sa aking kalungkutan,
Na tila sa mga panahong ako ay may kabagabagan,
Ang sarap sa pakiramdam na karamay ko ang mga ulan.
Nanlalamig ang aking puso at pakiramdam,
Sa tuwing naaalala kong marami ang mapagdadaanan
Mga pagsubok na mahirap takasan,
Kaya isinasambit na lamang sa kawalan.
Nakikita ko na ang kanyang pagdamay,
Ay napakasarap na aking mataglay,
Na kahit ako pa man ngayon ay lubos na nalulumbay,
Mayroon sa akin payapang tumutunghay.
Na ang kanyang mga mata ay puno rin minsan,
Ng mga luhang kayhirap pigilan,
Ano mang sandali ay papatak ng lubusan,
Upang ang sakit sa damdamin ay mabawasan.
Naninimdim ang kanyang pagsuyo,
Upang maalis ang nananaganang pagsiphayo,
Wari bagang sa akin ay nakikisalo,
Kaya akoy nalulugod kahit isang minuto.
Ang aking pagtitig sa malamig niyang pagyakap,
Nakakapanumbalik ng aking yaong sikap.
Na sa madaling panahon ay akin ng matanggap,
At ang kagalakan ay akin ng malasap.
Nilulunggati nitong aking kaginhawaan,
Na magpasumpong na sa akin muli ng tuluyan.
Nais na niyang kumawala sa rehas ng kalumbayan,
Upang ako muli ay kanyang mahawakan.
Sapagkat kung minsan ang aking napapansin,
Ang pagsungit ng panahon ay mahirap pigilin,
Napakasama rin na ito ay hamunin,
Gaya ng aking pabugso bugsong damdamin.
Kaya naman ang pagtahak ng aking saloobin ,
Gapangin na ang dapat na gapangin.
Alisin na ang pighati at ang hapay na mithiin,
Upang pumayapa na ang ganid na tuso kung lupigin.
At ang lahat ng tubig na buhos ng kalangitan,
May halong ibat ibang anyo ng larawan,
Sumasalamin sa akin at sa iba pa nitong natatanglawan,
Ng kanyang malakas o mahinang pagsalangsang.
Sapagkat ang aking pagiisip ay napakasagana,
Ang hirap ipahiwatig at ipaalam sa iba,
Kung kaya sa mga panahong umuulan ng masagana,
Nararamdaman kong ako'y hindi nagiisa.
Ang sarap titigan at damhin ang ulan.
Ang sarap kausapin at siya ay sabihan,
Ng lahat ng aking mga suliranin at karanasan,
Na nais kong ibahagi ,ipasumpong at ipalarawan.
At ang mga patak na akin ngayong kapiling,
Kasama ng mga lungkot at bagabag na nais ko nang lisanin,
Marahan kong sinasabi na ako muna ay inyong patigilin,
Na akin kayong makita at tulungan niyo akong huwag ko muna kayong damhin.
Dahil alam kong pagkatapos nitong yaong aking mga nadarama,
Ay sisikat ang isang napakagandang umaga,
Tititig sa akin at marahang mangangamusta,
At magbibigay muli sa akin ng bagong pag-asa.
Kakailanganin ko ito upang aking ipagpatuloy pang muli,
Ang aking mga nasimulang naudlot na mga minimithi,
Upang sa dulo ang aking pagngiti,
Ay tanda na ang kaligayahan ang aking pinipili.
-Patrick Star-
Darkness. . .
Anywhere I look. . .
Is Darkness. . .
I can still remember, the last long weekend had passed
without any light. It’s full of darkness, from the road up until our house.
Everything is shrouded in darkness.
“Has it always been this dark?” I asked myself.
I walked and walked. Neither a single soul is to be found
nor a glimpse of light or a sound. Every lamp post I passed is like a distant
past.
Suddenly I came to a stop, as my feet where about to snap.
“I’m tired. . .” with a sigh I murmured.
How ironic to think that I used to climb these in the past,
yet here I am catching my breath just like collecting scattered dusts.
I stumbled upon a large rock and from there I sat.
How long do I need to climb? It feels like I’ve been
climbing long enough, yet I still cannot find the top. Do I even need to keep
going? Is there any point in going on? These thoughts have bothered me while I
rest.
“OH! You’re earlier than I expected! Shall we go?” a man
asked.
I stared blankly at him. His face seems familiar.
Suddenly I recognized him, “OH! Uncle!” I said.
“What, already tired? You’ve still got a long way to go.
Let’s go!” he said.
And so, I decided to carry on.
As we were walking, something whispered in my mind.
“What, already tired? You’ve still got a long way to go.”
These thought have echoed in my mind like a giant bell being rang.
“What if I stop?” I asked.
“Think about this. If you stop now, would you be able to
know what’s on top?” my uncle answered with a smile.
I looked up at the sky and I saw the stars. “The sky will
never be the same again.” I suddenly uttered these words.
We continued to walk and as we go higher, the journey
becomes harder, from paved roads to rocky paths. Every step I make, the more I
can feel my weight. Every breath I take, rushes me to my broken state.
“Still alive?” my uncle asked ridiculously.
With a laugh I answered, “I guess I’m still alive but barely
breathing.”
While laughing at each other, my uncle suddenly point at
somewhere.
As I look to where he pointed. . .
I was shocked and amazed at the same time.
I saw the light coming from the city. It was so bright like
a rising sun, full of blue, yellow, orange and white color that lightens up the
dark night. And above them, the stars twinkle like a Christmas light beside
comes the moon which looks like she had just awoken from her slumber.
With a sigh I said, “Such a perfect view!”
I never thought that it was this good. . .
“So was it worth it?” my uncle asked.
I answered with a smile,” Yes it was! It really was worth
it!”
We stayed there for a while and after a couple of minutes we
went home.
As I entered the house, I suddenly realized that it’s still
dark, even darker than before.
I looked outside the window and there from the house of our
neighbour, I saw it!
“Eureka!” I shouted with joy.
But is it really true?
With a spark of joy and hope, I stared at it.
Was it really Hope? Happiness? Heaven? LOVE?!
With heavy breath, I took my step.
One after another.
Slowly.
My heart beat faster and faster.
I felt excited at the same time terrified.
I suddenly came to a stop.
I reached for it slowly.
And just before I open it, I shouted with confidence, “Let
there be light!”
Then
There was light.
Last August 17, 2015, We attended a forum that promoted an upcoming movie entitled Heneral Luna, a film about the Filipino-American war and the late General Antonio Luna, and discussed to us many different things about being a bayani and about General Luna’s life. They showed us the achievements the Luna brothers earned during their youth. We were moved just by seeing some of their great works, but we also felt somewhat useless. Those people being able to achieve such goals at the same age as we are made us ask ourselves “What have we done?” And so we came up with an idea of what we will be publishing on our second whisper, a topic about heroes. Do heroes really exist or are they just humans like everybody else? Did people made heroes up to retain the hope that is obviously diminishing at the time being? I sometimes ask these questions to myself. And now I will share to you what my mind whispers back.
Before I say anything that’s in my mind, let me
first tell you a story.
“Once upon a time, 33 small countries fought
together against an empire. One day, a rebel troop visited a man named Joseph,
who lived with his daughter. Owing debt to the troop, he gladly accepted their
plea for help. They headed for a cavern in the snow field. With Joseph’s help,
the troop defeated the adamantoise in
the snow field cavern and acquired the Goddess Bell they needed to enter the
empire’s castle. On their way home, they fell into a trap set by a traitor.
Joseph gave his life to save the troop. The troop left without telling Joseph’s
daughter, Nelly, about the tragedy.” However, there are 2 endings for this
story, the Human and the Hero, and it all depends on how you see it. The Human
says “Historian's explanation: The fact that they didn't report Joseph's death
to his daughter was indicative of their guilt for failing to protect him. In the
end, heroes are also human.” and
the Hero “Historian's explanation: Although Joseph's death was not reported to
his daughter, the manner of his death speaks for itself. This is the story of a
true hero.”(Final Fantasy IX)
For me, I choose the human ending. I feel that the
Human ending is more credible. I believe that everyone is human. I keep
thinking that it is absurd to entitle someone a hero because we are all equal,
we are all the same. It is very similar to calling someone smarter than
another, mightier, prettier, or even eviler. Who are we to give names? If we
are all equal then we shouldn’t praise one’s work and criticize the other’s.
Yeah, for sure someone may have done better but that doesn’t mean that the
others didn’t give their all. Maybe the so called Hero went beyond the limits,
but what about the others who were not recognized? So our society is picky with
the people we give respect to? A society that recognizes results more than
efforts. How about the doctors? The doctors give all they got to save people
yet they receive way less attention than those in the showbiz industry. It’s
easy to talk about people on television, but it’s hard to personally say that
your loved one has passed. It’s easier to criticize in a blog rather than doing
the real thing in real life. I know I am not in the position to say anything
but this is the whispers in my mind.
Heroes, for me, are just fantasies created by people
to make us believe more in hope. I am not saying that I hate hope, but people
with power use the hope we cling into to hypnotize and use us. The comic book
superheroes emerged when it was a time of war, a time where heroes are needed,
a time where hope was lacking. And I see the same thing with the people who
were named heroes. At first I believed in heroes, but I saw people used us
while we cling on hope. Promised us that they will change the future, but there
wasn’t any.
So, to sum it up, I am not saying that heroes are
dummies or lies. I am saying that heroes are just title people give to the
character at the end of the story. For me it doesn’t matter if people treat you
as a hero or not, all that matters is that we give our best. The finale does
not tell the story. We should learn from the story of heroes, but let’s not
forget that everything depends on us. Let those heroes be inspirations.
Now I ask you. Do you believe in heroes?
~ Dizzy is Justice~
Nag aanyaya ang isang tinig sa maraming mga tagapakinig,
Naghihintay ng pagsusuri sa iba't-ibang damdaming tagapakinig.
Hayaan sana ninyo na sa iba't-ibang istorya kayo ay maantig,
Upang mapukaw ang kaginhawaan sa puso, lalo na sa isip na nanlalamig.
Nais naming ihandog ang iba't-ibang larawan ng karanasan,
Na marahil ay bihira lamang kung ating mapakinggan.
Tunghayan sana ito upang masumpungan ng mainam,
Ang tunay na kwento sa likod ng isipang mapanglinlang.
Ibabahagi rito ang malawak na nalalaman,
Sa loob ng sintidong hindi madalas mailarawan.
Lahat ng paghihirap, sakit at kaginhawaan,
Sisikaping mailabas sa istorya ng dahan-dahan.
Sapagkat aming nababatid na tayo ay tao lamang,
May mga saloobing iniinda na hindi palaging ipinapaalam:
Umiiyak, nagagalit, tumatawa, nasasaktan,
Nagdurusa, naninibugho at nagdaramdam.
Iguguhit sa isip ang iba't-ibang katha.
Lahat ng damdamin ay ating itatala,
Upang maraming saloobin ay ating magunita,
Magsisilbing gabay sa ating mga paghusga.
Lahat ng alinlangan ay gagapiin,
Upang ang mga ito ay hindi na tayo pinsalain,
Kaya ang mga paglalahad na aming gagawin,
Sa ating kapakanan ay magandang simulain.
Malalalim na pag-iisip sisikaping tunguhin.
Pagdududa at takot susubukang alisin,
Upang mamulat ang tamang isipin,
At mawatas lahat ng mga suliranin.
Ang iba't-ibang mga karanasan na aming iuulat,
May iba't-ibang kulay at anyong nararapat;
At ang lahat ng mga bagay na maisusulat,
Mangaghahandog ng siphayo sa atin ng sapat.
Kung kaya naman sa ganitong mga kaparaanan,
Hayaan ninyong ikaw, ako o tayo ay magkatulong-tulungan.
Pakinggan ninyo sana lahat ng aming karanasan,
Upang kung maging magkapareho ang saloobin, kayo ay aming madamayan-
Sa paraang nalalaman ninyo na amin kayong naiintindihan,
At pagdating sa amin sana'y kayo ay gayon rin naman.
At dito magsisimula ang aming tunguhin-
Ang maglahad ng mga bulong na di dapat biruin.
Mga bulong na di natin madalas kilatisin,
Ngunit di natin batid, sa ating pagkatao ay may malaking papel din.
Ang nilulunggati nga nitong mga bulong,
Sila ay pakinggan, ang sagot ay may tanong.
Baka rin kasi hindi namamalayan, humihingi na ng tulong,
Sapagkat hindi sila makawala sa kalagayang nakakulong.
Huwag naman sanang takpan ang tainga't damdamin,
Marahan sanang pakinggan ang lahat ng mga saloobin.
Ganap naman na aming patuloy na sisikapin,
Makabahagi ng mga kwento na makabuluhang kamtin.
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
